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Sheila: Yeah he cracked onto me a bit, but he was such a big f*cken skite I couldnt stand him earbashin me after a good twenty minutes, so I told him to get stuffed

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Youre never that far from an awestruck description of a woman taking her clothes off You open your dress and show me your tits on the swing set at the playground or from a sighing suggestion that Its just as good as I knew it would be, or from some pretty awful wordplay: Your lips, my lips, apocalypse. Sweet, meanwhile, finds him apparently breaking off from enthusiastically playing with himself Watching the video where youre lying in your red lingerie 10 times nightly in order to pitch some fairly sickly wooing in the direction of his inamorata: Its so sweet knowing that you love me sweet knowing that I love you and running my fingers through your hair, its so sweet. Whether you find this kind of (presumably) faux naivety charming, irritating or a bit creepy Know you dont really need to be in love to make love to me, wheedles Truly its a definite improvement on the moments when Gonzalez stops writing like a 16-year-old recently divested of his virginity and decides to play the sophisticated lothario

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